Alien Abduction - A javahead serial ...

[iampatches13]

I seem to have jumped into this a little late. Perhaps I am a sleeper awoken like a drowsy morning stumbler shifting my way towards the the powerful aromatics of freshly brewed coffee, served as is of course, dark and glistening in my over sized coffee mug.

I don't know about you guys but the thought of joining up doesn't seem so bad. I mean the thought of oozing coffee. It is already my life blood, my driving force. I want, nay I need to share it with the world.

It does seem to shed light on the whole "probe" issue I hear people raving about though. I think they got it wrong when they used the word probe. Maybe they should have called it a group because I am sure the fully matured alien pours nothing but strong dark coffee out of it.

I say bring it on, make me into a coffee spewing beast. I would most definitely be cannibalistic if I were a coffee bean, and I'm not convinced any of you would be disinclined to either. And if theres no one else to eat and drink I have just got to say

Everyone loves their own brand.

 

[caffe biscotto]

Funny how every one of your paragraphs just began with an "I".

Anyway, better late than never to join in on the fun. It's good that you've introduced a new element to the alien story, that being sleeper agents. Your type is certainly welcomed into this growing story of alien clones and abductions. You have a creative and interesting way with words.

Hmmm..... is it paranoia, my sense that you could actually be an alien clone of Mako Shark, waiting to take him over when he least expects it?
No matter, the more Maine members, the merrier.

 

[CCafe]

He's deployable in a moments notice and we prefer to him as an .......................Ibot! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (more deranged laughing)

 

[caffe biscotto]

Oh no, Scary Cannibal Alien Argonaut Ibots!!!!!

They've not only cloned us, but have used our own technology against us!!!

Where is Will Smith when you need him???!!

 

[MakoShark]

Alien Coffee Chronicles

Pssst. Shhhh. I have to whisper, in order to be very quiet. I'm invisible. You can't see me. I'm coming to you from another dimension. Only my intellect is perceptible to humans through telepathic means.

The aliens communicate between one another's minds by some means other than sensory perception. I had to enter a parallel dimension in order to escape their abduction this time. I had run short of oolong tea (darjeeling does not work), and was in the process of being consumed.

Only with quick thinking and use of my handy temporal evanesculator on my belt pack was I able to escape their clutches and flesh extractors.

On super-secret Coffee Crusader assignment, I have infiltrated the transfiguration hub through which they travel. They are crafty, these cannibalistic alien abductors. Who would have thought that those furry fluffy cuddly little Ibots could possibly have been agents of terror from Alpha Centauri. I have hundreds of them in my garden!

Topher might have been the innocent carrier of these masked little fuzzballs. Remember his Nike's? The green ooze? It makes sense to me. On my assignment I discovered that the green ooze has disappeared. No sign of the supposed colonies. Maybe Topher is not an alien after all!

I don't know what to think! Is it possible that the Ibots are the real controllers of this abduction?

Is it possible that this whole world wide threat of coffee roasting, popcorn popping, oolong pouring, black coffee drinking, vegetarian and flesh consuming, cloning, coffee oozing out every pore, Scary Cannibal Alien Argonaut Ibots is merely a smoke-screen for the proliferation of these silly little pals? THESE LITTLE GUYS ARE INSIDIOUS STEALTHY TREACHEROUS AND DECEITFUL ENEMIES FROM ANOTHER GALAXY?

I don't think so. No.

Mako

 

[CCafe]

Re: Alien Coffee Chronicles

Pssst. Shhhh. I have to whisper, in order to be very quiet. I'm invisible. You can't see me. I'm coming to you from another dimension. Only my intellect is perceptible to humans through telepathic means.

The aliens communicate between one another's minds by some means other than sensory perception. I had to enter a parallel dimension in order to escape their abduction this time. I had run short of oolong tea (darjeeling does not work), and was in the process of being consumed.

Only with quick thinking and use of my handy temporal evanesculator on my belt pack was I able to escape their clutches and flesh extractors.

On super-secret Coffee Crusader assignment, I have infiltrated the transfiguration hub through which they travel. They are crafty, these cannibalistic alien abductors. Who would have thought that those furry fluffy cuddly little Ibots could possibly have been agents of terror from Alpha Centauri. I have hundreds of them in my garden!

Topher might have been the innocent carrier of these masked little fuzzballs. Remember his Nike's? The green ooze? It makes sense to me. On my assignment I discovered that the green ooze has disappeared. No sign of the supposed colonies. Maybe Topher is not an alien after all!

I don't know what to think! Is it possible that the Ibots are the real controllers of this abduction?

Is it possible that this whole world wide threat of coffee roasting, popcorn popping, oolong pouring, black coffee drinking, vegetarian and flesh consuming, cloning, coffee oozing out every pore, Scary Cannibal Alien Argonaut Ibots is merely a smoke-screen for the proliferation of these silly little pals? THESE LITTLE GUYS ARE INSIDIOUS STEALTHY TREACHEROUS AND DECEITFUL ENEMIES FROM ANOTHER GALAXY?

I don't think so. No.

Mako

Another dimension, don't be absurd! Your location gave you away! :grin:

Your in Maine, unless that void between your two ears is the other dimension!

:twisted:

Fool me once.............

 

[caffe biscotto]

So, the mighty Mako Shark has been located by the clever CCafe and his alien horde of computer geeks who have been hacking into our locations database.

Quick! Mako, come over to the dark side before CCafe clones you and makes you roast his Kona coffees for mere slave wages! Or change your location to "the void between my ears".

Ha ha ha ha.......

 

[MakoShark]

the void between my ears

Well, alright. I have taken sage advice from my forum mentor and resident guru Mr. Biscotto, and renamed my location "the void between my ears". Just for a while.

Oh, CCafe you are so smart! But you are not fooling anybody. Maine doesn't sport crop circles, not one. But in Iowa ... well, I think that says it all. No need for me to move over to the dark side Biscotto, I'll stay with Full City, Portland that is.

Mako

 

[MakoShark]

Alliteration

By the way Ed, nice job with alliteration.
-- Mighty Mako Shark
-- Clever CCafe

And Bodacious Biscotto!

Pronunciation: bō-ˈdā-shəs
Function: adjective
Etymology: probably blend of bold and audacious
Date: 1832

1: Southern & Midland : outright, unmistakable
2: remarkable, noteworthy "a bodacious bargain"

 

[stevekessler]

So when does part 2 of the Topher and Steve alien action adventure movie come out? And please tell me I'm skinny with big muscles in it!!!!!!

 

[MakoShark]

Alien Coffee Chronicles

Hello Stevekessler,

We're still writing the screenplay for Part 1. As to your profile, that will be up to you. But you've got to write your character into the serial to have that kind of control.

I am happy to believe you are skinny and muscled. Ah, the beauty of a forum! Believe it or not, I am 51 and bald! But my kids think I'm 3 going on 4. I'm not sure what that means exactly. Hmmm....

But I am getting a good workout, fighting off these hideous insidious aliens! And although I was led to believe that you had become one during your abduction on the way to the Twin Cities, you are sounding quite human. Usually clones of abducted and cannibalized former humans don't sound so... well, human.

CCafe may be the culprit. When not roasting coffees to attract more unsuspecting coffeeforums members, he's a mad scientist of sorts. Always seeking new ways to perfect the clones in his mad quest to eat this earth empty of humans. Then he moves on to other worlds to seek new victims. What a gluttonous cannibal he is.

Listen Stevekessler. If you are still human, and have successfully fought off the hoards of aliens in our midst, hang tough. Write of your experiences here. As one of the founding pilgrims on that fateful journey, you should have a lot to talk about. You can surely help us navigate the treacherous path to victory over the Ibots and the Centaurians.

As to the casting of your role, again that is completely in your control. However, if you are an alien... it really doesn't matter. For me, either way I'm hoping you're a writer.

Mako

 

[caffe biscotto]

Hey Mako, don't feel bad, I'm younger than you and balder, ha ha.

No worries, I hear baldies are bringin' sexy back. 8)

Stevekessler, you're certainly welcome to write yourself into the story. CCafe and Topher didn't get a chance to find the appropriate actors to portray themselves, but you still have time, before either Mako or I ring up Will Smith to see if he's available for portraying your character in The Coffee Alien Chronicles.

 

[topher]

Will Smith..hahaha try Woody Allen..just kidding Kessler!

 

[MakoShark]

Warrior Alert!

Attention Warriors!

In secret communication with John P. of Caffe D'Bolla in Salt Lake City, I have discovered a new weapon to use against the clones!

John has perfected his "light-on-the-cream saber" in defense against the indigenous local resistance to coffee force in his area. His bulwarks are strong and he is holding his beach-head against his local masses of "coffee unfaithful". I believe this weapon will turn CCafe and his marauding band of Alien Cannibals away from us, we courageous coffee forums members.

So, join me in congratulating John P. and his innovative invention. Welcome to the Chronicles!

MakoShark

 

[caffe biscotto]

Will Smith..hahaha try Woody Allen..just kidding Kessler!

(Okay then, Woody Allen, going once....... going twice....... Or maybe Kessler would prefer Woody Harrelson to portray him???)

Good catch MakoShark, John P would make an excellent warrior in the fight against the clever CCafe and his alien horde. With John P's light-on-the-cream saber, and your quick-witted negotiating tactics, we're bound to come out on top!!!